[Basil's mental timeline of the last week and some change has been hectic and disorienting. The change happened during the middle of the night, and the only real sensation he remembers from it is how scared and upset he felt. It was as if he was experiencing the worst of all of the weight bearing down on him all over again all at once, and just before things went dark, he remembers feeling...
Angry. So very, very angry.
Then, he woke up in the center of Bavan with no recollection of how he even got there, just the insistence burned into his brain that he find somebody that would turn out to be dead. And really, isn't that just what he should expect from his life, at this point? That from now on, things just won't ever be normal again? He's fated to suffer, and go through the same motions of uncertainty and being disillusioned with reality, until he manages to pull himself back together because he has no one to turn to. He's his only friend. He's the only person he can turn to. There is no one else to tell him that things are going to be okay.
But that...hasn't been the case, in Ryslig. People he barely knows, and in a lot of cases has only just met, have been falling all over themselves to help him. Komaeda, taking him in for the evening with not a single question asked, tending to his scrapes and making sure he was fed and looked after. Crash, who made sure he made it back to the Palazzo safely when he didn't know how to get there on his own.
And Fugo, who literally drops what he's doing at the mere sight of him, rushing to his feet with an expression of such genuine relief that it just doesn't seem real. Not even Basil's own parents cared about him as much as this man who has known Basil for barely a short handful of weeks.
Basil had been lingering in the doorway, but when Fugo gets up...he automatically starts forward, managing to stagger a single step before he feels his knees try to give out on him. They sort of lock up, and he's not sure if it's from fear, or apprehension, or something else he can't quite place. Instead of staying put where he is, though, Basil tries to push past that feeeling- like trying to walk through cement- and it results in him stumbling, tripping over the last few paces of steps separating him and Fugo until he ends up practically falling into the Mer's arms in his haste to get into the room.
He ends up half-clutching at the front of Fugo's shirt, and for a brief moment it almost sounds like he's...laughing. His breathing is quick and frantic, escaping him in shallow gasps as he struggles to keep himself mostly upright.
How long until Fugo realizes he doesn't want to deal with this anymore? When is the other shoe going to drop, and Komaeda wakes up to the realization that Basil is a burden, and can't ever be expected to be able to fend for himself here? When is he going to go back home, and likely wake up dead, because he drowned in that lake that Aubrey pushed him into, because she despised him so much?
When, when, when-
[What if I told you that he has been very, very bad? That he's done something reprehensible? Would you feel the same then?]
Basil's grip on Fugo falters, as his panicked attempts to draw in breath finally dissolve into tears, his forehead dropping against his chest so he won't have to see him cry.]
cw: memory loss, disassociation, panic, omori spoilers OH MY
Angry. So very, very angry.
Then, he woke up in the center of Bavan with no recollection of how he even got there, just the insistence burned into his brain that he find somebody that would turn out to be dead. And really, isn't that just what he should expect from his life, at this point? That from now on, things just won't ever be normal again? He's fated to suffer, and go through the same motions of uncertainty and being disillusioned with reality, until he manages to pull himself back together because he has no one to turn to. He's his only friend. He's the only person he can turn to. There is no one else to tell him that things are going to be okay.
But that...hasn't been the case, in Ryslig. People he barely knows, and in a lot of cases has only just met, have been falling all over themselves to help him. Komaeda, taking him in for the evening with not a single question asked, tending to his scrapes and making sure he was fed and looked after. Crash, who made sure he made it back to the Palazzo safely when he didn't know how to get there on his own.
And Fugo, who literally drops what he's doing at the mere sight of him, rushing to his feet with an expression of such genuine relief that it just doesn't seem real. Not even Basil's own parents cared about him as much as this man who has known Basil for barely a short handful of weeks.
Basil had been lingering in the doorway, but when Fugo gets up...he automatically starts forward, managing to stagger a single step before he feels his knees try to give out on him. They sort of lock up, and he's not sure if it's from fear, or apprehension, or something else he can't quite place. Instead of staying put where he is, though, Basil tries to push past that feeeling- like trying to walk through cement- and it results in him stumbling, tripping over the last few paces of steps separating him and Fugo until he ends up practically falling into the Mer's arms in his haste to get into the room.
He ends up half-clutching at the front of Fugo's shirt, and for a brief moment it almost sounds like he's...laughing. His breathing is quick and frantic, escaping him in shallow gasps as he struggles to keep himself mostly upright.
How long until Fugo realizes he doesn't want to deal with this anymore? When is the other shoe going to drop, and Komaeda wakes up to the realization that Basil is a burden, and can't ever be expected to be able to fend for himself here? When is he going to go back home, and likely wake up dead, because he drowned in that lake that Aubrey pushed him into, because she despised him so much?
When, when, when-
[What if I told you that he has been very, very bad? That he's done something reprehensible? Would you feel the same then?]
Basil's grip on Fugo falters, as his panicked attempts to draw in breath finally dissolve into tears, his forehead dropping against his chest so he won't have to see him cry.]